An Online Therapeutic Movement

My first online supervision starts this Monday at 6pm PST.

Counselors, coaches, catalysts, therapists, MFT interns, CSWs, anyone who wants to discuss caseloads or anything related to this field, your practice, branding, burnout, whatever, my first online supervision starts this Monday, Aug 4th.  

To sign up, go to www.theangrytherapist.com and click on classes / sessions.  That will take you to the mindbodyonline site.  You have to register with their site.  It’s free and easy.  Then click on classes, and forward the calendar to next week and you’ll see all the classes, including my supervision.  Click on “Sign up now”. 

I know that sounds super complicated but after you do it once, you’ll never be lost.  Like life.  Kinda.  Maybe not.

- Angry

Kind vs Nice

I think there’s a difference between kind and nice.  Sometimes, nice people are not kind because they want something in return.  Approval, acceptance, money?  I find that nice is not consistent sometimes.  Or it’s contingent on something.  Nice can be loaded, false, on the surface.  Kind runs deep.  Kind is authentic.  Kind comes from a real, genuine, honest place.  Kind is pure.  Kind is consistent.  Kind defines one’s character. 

When you’re working on your non-negotiables and the kind of people you want to surround yourself with, make sure the word you choose is kind.  Not nice. 

Kind is pure Irish grass fed butter. 

Nice is margarine.

- Angry 

Catalyst of the month
Elizabeth Mary.
Turbos kicked in or something, because Liz has been on fire this month.  She’s been posting about mindfulness every Monday, doing free sessions, and running online meditation classes.   Her energy has been amazing and she’s has a fierce determination that’s been quite contagious. 
I threw my favorite questions at her, the Vanity Fair questions.
What is your current state of mind?
~ Energetic and empowered. 
What is your idea of perfect happiness?
~ Incredibly passionate, intense sex with my partner; before, during and after. A solo jog as the sun is coming up, with barely anyone in sight as my breath is even and my legs are unstoppable. A delicious, savory meal followed by a chocolatey sweet. The moment I walk in the door to my puppy’s contagious positive energy. Sitting in the sunroom on my chair hammock as the sun is setting. When my partner pulls me in for a hug, then brings me in even tighter with a gentle hand placed along side my head. 
What is your greatest fear?
~ Losing those I love, being alone.
Which historical figure do you most identify with?
~ I identify with those who did not settle. Those who pushed the envelope and strived for something more. Something BETTER. Those who stood up for their beliefs. I identify with those who did not quiet those voices inside them, threw caution to the wind and said, “Fuck it! Let’s do this.” 
Which living person do you most admire? 
~ My auntie Debbie K. What a woman! She is who she is, free of judgement toward herself and others. Encouraging, loving, supportive. She takes care of herself and intentionally cares of others once her needs are met. Her marriage is full of love and respect. 
What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
~ My internal struggle of putting others before myself. I am getting better at this, but I still catch myself putting my needs aside. 
What is the trait you most deplore in others?
~ The lack of personal responsibility.
What is it that you most dislike?
~ I cannot stand the sound of people chewing. That gross noise of someone’s lips smacking while they eat. Chewing with one’s mouth open. Too much food in one’s mouth at once. Yuck.
What is your greatest extravagance?
~ My running shoes, headphones, kindle (a gift I had no idea I would treasure as much as I do) and journal.
What do you most value in your friends?
~ Understanding, patience, respect and time management along with the strength and willingness to call me on my shit.
What is your favorite journey?
~ The one I am currently on. 
What is your most treasured possession?
~ A very simple necklace given to me. It’s a circle on a chain. Within the circle is a camera lens, up close. Cool looking and one of the most thoughtful gifts I’ve ever received.
What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
~ There are various virtues pertaining to self-control. I understand them and can contain myself, but my goodness. Overrated! It is as though we pride ourselves on self-control at times. It’s nice to disregard that at times and let go of this internal battle of control.
On what occasion do you lie?
~ I lie when I don’t want to do something, but need an excuse to get out of it. I could be honest, but I find myself feeling guilty for not wanting to take part, so I lie. I’m getting better at respecting my “I just don’t want to”mind frame and stating this, but I’m not fully there yet.
Which living person do you most despise?
~ Despise? I honestly cannot think of one person. There are people I dislike, but I don’t have time to channel my energy into despising or hating anyone. That is far too draining.
What or who is the greatest love of your life?
~ Corey. My love. My partner. My lighthouse, rock, port. My aphrodisiac, my favorite smell, my loss of breath, my weak knees, my challenge, my comfort. 
When and where were you happiest?
~ Growing up, I was so happy hearing the “happy birthday” song, sung to me at my birthday parties. It was a time when I had the spotlight, positive attention and loved ones around me which was not a constant in my life. Now, as an adult and without the toxicity I had growing up, my happiest moment to date would be when I opened myself up to the possibility of a healthy relationship which is something I never had before.
If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
~ I would change my inability to fly. How awesome would that be?!
What do you consider your greatest achievement?
~ I travelled on my own in various parts of the world, at sixteen I came out as bi-sexual, I jumped out of a plane (with a parachute), I jumped off cliffs into water, I graduated H.S., college and graduate school, I embraced love, I broke free of my unhealthy patterns and toxic relationships, acknowledged my flaws and decided to make changes to better my life. There are a number of things in my life I am proud of which qualify for this. I do not want to narrow it down to one.
If you could change one thing about your family, what would it be?
~ Less enmeshment, more respect of personal space.
What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
~ That point where you give up and figure there is no point in fighting anymore. When you decide you are no longer worth the challenge.
What is your favorite occupation?
~ I love what I’m doing. Therapist, life coach, meditation instructor. Wouldn’t it be cool to be a professional roller derby skater or acrobat? Maybe a novelist, photographer or hot air balloon guide. So many possibilities. Until I try them all, my favorite would have to be therapist: life guide and journey companion. 
What is your most marked characteristic?
~ My unrelenting will.
Who is your favorite hero of fiction?
~ There are so many, but I love Merida from the movie Brave. This movie brings women to the forefront and encourages girls to be strong and strive for something more. Merida wants to control her own destiny. Something I wish all girls/women could embrace. Also, Poison Ivy (yes a villain), but what a badass! Female, eco-friendly, the ability to kill and cure with a kiss, lesbian and fights for what she feels is right.
How would you like to die?
~ Either in my sleep, at a ripe old age after having lived a long and fruitful life, or in some insane blaze of glory like a botched robbery where I was attempting to accomplish some Robin Hood type scenario. Either way, peaceful, happy and quick.
What is your motto?
~ Try. Nothing in life is permanent, so why not try something better, new and/or different?
Schedule a session or jump into one of her meditation classes HERE.

Catalyst of the month

Elizabeth Mary.

Turbos kicked in or something, because Liz has been on fire this month.  She’s been posting about mindfulness every Monday, doing free sessions, and running online meditation classes.   Her energy has been amazing and she’s has a fierce determination that’s been quite contagious. 

I threw my favorite questions at her, the Vanity Fair questions.

What is your current state of mind?

~ Energetic and empowered. 

What is your idea of perfect happiness?

~ Incredibly passionate, intense sex with my partner; before, during and after. A solo jog as the sun is coming up, with barely anyone in sight as my breath is even and my legs are unstoppable. A delicious, savory meal followed by a chocolatey sweet. The moment I walk in the door to my puppy’s contagious positive energy. Sitting in the sunroom on my chair hammock as the sun is setting. When my partner pulls me in for a hug, then brings me in even tighter with a gentle hand placed along side my head. 

What is your greatest fear?

~ Losing those I love, being alone.

Which historical figure do you most identify with?

~ I identify with those who did not settle. Those who pushed the envelope and strived for something more. Something BETTER. Those who stood up for their beliefs. I identify with those who did not quiet those voices inside them, threw caution to the wind and said, “Fuck it! Let’s do this.” 

Which living person do you most admire? 

~ My auntie Debbie K. What a woman! She is who she is, free of judgement toward herself and others. Encouraging, loving, supportive. She takes care of herself and intentionally cares of others once her needs are met. Her marriage is full of love and respect. 

What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?

~ My internal struggle of putting others before myself. I am getting better at this, but I still catch myself putting my needs aside. 

What is the trait you most deplore in others?

~ The lack of personal responsibility.

What is it that you most dislike?

~ I cannot stand the sound of people chewing. That gross noise of someone’s lips smacking while they eat. Chewing with one’s mouth open. Too much food in one’s mouth at once. Yuck.

What is your greatest extravagance?

~ My running shoes, headphones, kindle (a gift I had no idea I would treasure as much as I do) and journal.

What do you most value in your friends?

~ Understanding, patience, respect and time management along with the strength and willingness to call me on my shit.

What is your favorite journey?

~ The one I am currently on. 

What is your most treasured possession?

~ A very simple necklace given to me. It’s a circle on a chain. Within the circle is a camera lens, up close. Cool looking and one of the most thoughtful gifts I’ve ever received.

What do you consider the most overrated virtue?

~ There are various virtues pertaining to self-control. I understand them and can contain myself, but my goodness. Overrated! It is as though we pride ourselves on self-control at times. It’s nice to disregard that at times and let go of this internal battle of control.

On what occasion do you lie?

~ I lie when I don’t want to do something, but need an excuse to get out of it. I could be honest, but I find myself feeling guilty for not wanting to take part, so I lie. I’m getting better at respecting my “I just don’t want to”mind frame and stating this, but I’m not fully there yet.

Which living person do you most despise?

~ Despise? I honestly cannot think of one person. There are people I dislike, but I don’t have time to channel my energy into despising or hating anyone. That is far too draining.

What or who is the greatest love of your life?

~ Corey. My love. My partner. My lighthouse, rock, port. My aphrodisiac, my favorite smell, my loss of breath, my weak knees, my challenge, my comfort. 

When and where were you happiest?

~ Growing up, I was so happy hearing the “happy birthday” song, sung to me at my birthday parties. It was a time when I had the spotlight, positive attention and loved ones around me which was not a constant in my life. Now, as an adult and without the toxicity I had growing up, my happiest moment to date would be when I opened myself up to the possibility of a healthy relationship which is something I never had before.

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

~ I would change my inability to fly. How awesome would that be?!

What do you consider your greatest achievement?

~ I travelled on my own in various parts of the world, at sixteen I came out as bi-sexual, I jumped out of a plane (with a parachute), I jumped off cliffs into water, I graduated H.S., college and graduate school, I embraced love, I broke free of my unhealthy patterns and toxic relationships, acknowledged my flaws and decided to make changes to better my life. There are a number of things in my life I am proud of which qualify for this. I do not want to narrow it down to one.

If you could change one thing about your family, what would it be?

~ Less enmeshment, more respect of personal space.

What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?

~ That point where you give up and figure there is no point in fighting anymore. When you decide you are no longer worth the challenge.

What is your favorite occupation?

~ I love what I’m doing. Therapist, life coach, meditation instructor. Wouldn’t it be cool to be a professional roller derby skater or acrobat? Maybe a novelist, photographer or hot air balloon guide. So many possibilities. Until I try them all, my favorite would have to be therapist: life guide and journey companion. 

What is your most marked characteristic?

~ My unrelenting will.

Who is your favorite hero of fiction?

~ There are so many, but I love Merida from the movie Brave. This movie brings women to the forefront and encourages girls to be strong and strive for something more. Merida wants to control her own destiny. Something I wish all girls/women could embrace. Also, Poison Ivy (yes a villain), but what a badass! Female, eco-friendly, the ability to kill and cure with a kiss, lesbian and fights for what she feels is right.

How would you like to die?

~ Either in my sleep, at a ripe old age after having lived a long and fruitful life, or in some insane blaze of glory like a botched robbery where I was attempting to accomplish some Robin Hood type scenario. Either way, peaceful, happy and quick.

What is your motto?

~ Try. Nothing in life is permanent, so why not try something better, new and/or different?

Schedule a session or jump into one of her meditation classes HERE.

An except from my Catalyst Course syllabus

If you’re intimidated to coach because you don’t have a license or a clinical therapy background, I want to tell you what the journey is like.  Because most therapists won’t tell you.  There’s something about licenses and degrees in general that make people close that curtain. I get it.  They spent a lot of time and money to earn their degree / license so why should they let you in.  And my point isn’t to bash people who have earned their Masters and PHDs.  They will be able to charge a higher premium for their services.  I just want to shed light on what the process is like for those of you who are curious and feeling insecure to help others because you didn’t go that route, which by the way is the number one reason why people don’t become life coaches.  They don’t believe they can’t without a clinical background.

Therapy school cost me roughly $60,000.  I learned theories and a ton of facts that I don’t remember today.  Partly due to my A.D.D. and partly due to the language.  It’s abstract and complicated.  I think I would have learned more if I just Googled theories instead trying to digest all of those dense textbooks, which no one really reads.  They skim.  It was a miracle I even passed my exams.  What they don’t tell you before you sign up for the program is that when you get out, you have to complete 3,000 hours.  This is the most difficult piece of the journey.  It took me nearly six years and I pulled an Indiana Jones.  I finished right before the deadline (there’s a six year time limit and if you don’t finish in that time they start taking hours away).  But it’s actually where I learned the most.  In actual practice.  The practice you do need.  The school you don’t.  

I believe because of the internet, you can now get this practice online.  But isn’t it irresponsible to help people when you haven’t had any clinical training?  Yes. 

But.

One.  You’re a life coach.  Not a therapist.  If you run into someone who wants to be treated for schizophrenia, you probably wouldn’t see them.  You would refer them out to someone who is qualified.

Two.  I’ve been helping people for nearly ten years now, probably close to 10,000 sessions.  Mostly online.  And I have not had to dig out my DSM (the Bible of clinical disorders) one time.  Not because I’m lazy.  Most people want help with general life problems, relationships, break ups, transitions, etc.  They may have personality disorders, or eating disorders, or whatever, but that doesn’t have to be your focus.  I’ve learned that it’s more effective it it’s not.  There are better ways in.  My point is you can still see them for other parts of their life that hey are struggling with.  As I helped more and more people, I discovered what worked and what didn’t.  And through the years, I came up with my own concepts, language, and ways in.   I had to because it was the only way I could understand this process.  If not, I would be afraid. And when you’re afraid, you will never be at your potential. 

Most don’t pursue this profession because they are afraid.  They don’t have theories they can use, or ways in.  They just know they’re really good at giving advice.  But that’s not coaching.  That’s being a friend.        

My Catalyst course is designed to give you some easy to use tools and theories I have come up with over the years that are practical and effective.  They also overlap the theoretical orientations I learned in grad school, like family systems and CBT, so you get the best of both worlds.  My goal is to give you some form of structure.  And with this structure, you can build and create your own theory / style.  That’s on the surface.  That’s what I offer you on paper.  But underneath, “subtext” if you’ve taken my course, my goal is to make you less afraid.  I want to crack open your fear door so passion and confidence starts to shine in.  And one way I will do this is through community, creating a safe space for people like you, to feel support, get help, get clients, and continue to learn and grow as a coach.  To feel like you’re part of something so you don’t have to do this alone like I did. 

(Spoiler alert) 

My last sentence of my last class doesn’t end with “goodbye”. 

It ends with “Welcome to The Angry Therapist”. 

My next Catalyst course starts in mid August.

www.theangrytherapist.com

- Angry




Meditation for Athletes

This class offers visualizations to assist in your meditation. Within each visual, we’ll channel all that inner strength to obtain relaxation, endurance and strength.
All you need is your phone and an open mind.
Reserve your seat for this Friday at 10:30am PST.https://clients.mindbodyonline.com/ASP/home.asp?studioid=177358
Meditation for Athletes

This class offers visualizations to assist in your meditation. Within each visual, we’ll channel all that inner strength to obtain relaxation, endurance and strength.

All you need is your phone and an open mind.

Reserve your seat for this Friday at 10:30am PST.

https://clients.mindbodyonline.com/ASP/home.asp?studioid=177358

unfukyourself:

I love this project for several reasons . First of all, it was created by someone that I have been working with in her quest for freedom from tremendous suffering for several months now. It is one of the greatest joys that I know to see depression slowly melting and the twinkles of life and hope slowly beginning to glow once again in someone’s eyes. I don’t mean to put words in her mouth, but I think she is beginning to see the greater picture of everything she has been through. “Why me?” is not a question that can ever be answered, but “What can I do with it?” is a question that brings an enormous sense of purpose and beauty to one’s life and allows you to go on an adventure not otherwise possible. There is an epidemic not only of depression and anxiety, but also self-harm, especially in young people. Most of them hide it in their personal life and then retreat to places on the internet where they gather and let their pain out. Most of it is really graphic, triggering, and just tragic. It leads them nowhere except to darker places. This project is an interactive safe space as well as a chronicle of her own journey and triumph over tremendous obstacles. Overcoming these struggles is not about coping, it is about growing, and I really celebrate how brave she is in sharing her story and inspiring others to do the same. http://www.projectbadass89.tumblr.com/ 

unfukyourself:

I love this project for several reasons . First of all, it was created by someone that I have been working with in her quest for freedom from tremendous suffering for several months now. It is one of the greatest joys that I know to see depression slowly melting and the twinkles of life and hope slowly beginning to glow once again in someone’s eyes. I don’t mean to put words in her mouth, but I think she is beginning to see the greater picture of everything she has been through. “Why me?” is not a question that can ever be answered, but “What can I do with it?” is a question that brings an enormous sense of purpose and beauty to one’s life and allows you to go on an adventure not otherwise possible. 

There is an epidemic not only of depression and anxiety, but also self-harm, especially in young people. Most of them hide it in their personal life and then retreat to places on the internet where they gather and let their pain out. Most of it is really graphic, triggering, and just tragic. It leads them nowhere except to darker places. This project is an interactive safe space as well as a chronicle of her own journey and triumph over tremendous obstacles. Overcoming these struggles is not about coping, it is about growing, and I really celebrate how brave she is in sharing her story and inspiring others to do the same. http://www.projectbadass89.tumblr.com/ 

MONDAY MADNESS! 
The first fifty new members will receive the LIVE PERSON feature upgrade on my site.  This allows you the ability chat with a Catalyst coach live one on one.  Because not everyone wants to use a webcam.  And of course, you get my books, articles, forums, and all that other stuff. 
$5 bucks a month.  Cancel anytime.
If you’re already a member, email me and I’ll upgrade you for free.
www.theangrytherapist.com

MONDAY MADNESS!

The first fifty new members will receive the LIVE PERSON feature upgrade on my site.  This allows you the ability chat with a Catalyst coach live one on one.  Because not everyone wants to use a webcam.  And of course, you get my books, articles, forums, and all that other stuff. 

$5 bucks a month.  Cancel anytime.

If you’re already a member, email me and I’ll upgrade you for free.

www.theangrytherapist.com

Ask Angry

Q:  Ok so I feel (don’t even know why) like I have to share with you certain things about myself because although this is the 1st (second technically) time I reach out to you, I’ve been drawn to you and what you do and how you do it. I found you by chance and I totally believe in that kind of stuff. So here goes… I got my masters in mental health counseling and completed my internship in a psych ward. I LOVED my work, I HATED my experience and supervision and supervisor. It was an experience that in many ways damaged my self esteem as a therapist and as a person -I felt like wow, am I really that unlikeable? Anywho, I left with a bitter taste in my mouth in terms of how therapy is done and the field as a whole. I particularly found my program to be not very challenging as well. So THAT, paired with my a very complicated personal life, and I am at stuck at a total stand still. 

I want more. There’s more to this, there’s more for me. Can catalyst make me a better therapist? Can I start working as a life coach while I work on licensure? I’ve noticed people on your team all have their niches… is that a prerequisite? 
I’d be doing it online… whats the schedule like for the August course?
Sorry for the scattered feeling behind this email… you can tell where my minds at!
A:  I totally get what you’re saying and that’s why I started Catalyst and now online supervision.  Can Catalyst make you a better therapist?  I believe so or I wouldn’t run the course.  I can only teach you what I know, through my journey from non-profit to private treatment centers and of course all my trails and tribulations online, as well as my own theories and ways in.  Although I don’t regret getting my MFT, I think there is so much more to helping others than what they teach you.  I think grad schools don’t focus on what will make you unique as an individual coach that separates you from everyone else, hence raising your potential and making it easier for you to gain traction and clients.  I think many graduate and fade into the background, then get frustrated and angry at the system or their choices.  I kinda felt like I was pumped out of a factory when I graduated and didn’t feel I had many options or support so I just took the first job I could.  There’s also a competitive energy in grad school, I guess like in any school, everyone scrambling to get traineeships, their hours, and licensed - which doesn’t guarantee you anything. 
I want the catalyst community to be different, an exclusive club of people who support and help each other, a place where you get water, fuel, where you can do this journey with others so you don’t burn out or feel so alone.  I think the best part about this profession is your own self growth and I don’t think you can do that alone.  I also think the way we get help is changing fast, and schools don’t address any of that stuff.  Anyway, my wish is that Catalyst, if you decide to take the course, is something that re sparks your desire to help others, reminds you why you chose this profession in the first place.  Yes, you can start working as a life coach any time.  Anyone can.  The question is can you get clients? 
- Angry

online group supervision

One major problem with the mental health and life coaching field is lack of support and supervision. Once you graduate, get your license, certificate, whatever buys you a ticket into the world of helping others, you are pushed into the ocean on a small one man raft.  It can be a daunting and lonely journey.  And unless you work for an agency or treatment center, supervision is something you must seek and pay for yourself.  But most rarely do because it’s expensive and let’s face it, we get lazy.

I’ve been thinking of a way to provide support and connect all coaches, whether you’re an MFT, addiction counselor, or a life coach, in a space where we can process our journey and grow as coaches.  Whether you’re just starting out or have a full practice, a place to to bring in your caseload, ideas, new techniques and interventions, but most importantly you’re own shit.  Yes, kill two birds by having supervision and a process life group.  I would want it to be casual, fun, honest. But most importantly, affordable. Because I know that most of us are paying off our student loans and living off Top Ramen.

Introducing a new weekly class on my platform.

ONLINE GROUP SUPERVISION - for therapists, interns, trainees, life coaches, addiction counselors and everyone taking my Catalyst course.

Approx. 1:15hr.
Every Monday at 6pm PST.
30 per class.  No commitment.  Drop in and out as you please. 

Lock in your seat now. Tell a friend.

HERE

www.theangrytherapist.com

1 2 3 4 5 Next → Archive