THE ANGRY THERAPIST

Rack Focus

For the first time in my life, I don’t feel like I have “my whole life ahead of me”. At the same time, I don’t feel old. I feel alive. Let me explain. I never appreciated time. I’ve always taken it for granted. There were moments when I would want to fast forward. I thought my life was boring. I wanted to get to the good parts. Now, I believe time is the most valuable resource we have. It is limited. To everyone, no matter how privileged or gifted. But instead of sitting there staring at the hourglass, I feel like breaking the glass and touching the sand.

I am almost 40 years old and everything in my life has brightened. This has less to do with urgency or a ticking clock and more to do with shifting from perception to perspective. Perception is what we think or feel about something or someone based on our past experiences. Perspective is not so much about past experiences but simply the view from which we observe something.

This switch occurs through pain. Through asking yourself some very difficult questions. Though checking your ego, fighting fear, letting go, and seeking truth. For me, it took marriage, divorce, failed relationships, and three careers. I don’t know what it will take for you or maybe you’ve already made the switch. And if you have, you know it’s not a switch but rather a long fucking dirt road. But here’s what I do know. If you’re not on it, get on it.

Because this shift has allowed me to remove judgement, peel labels, and finally see and appreciate what’s in front of me instead of looking back or focusing on what’s ahead. It has given me the ability to soak moments, hold time with two hands, and feel it instead of watching it. Changing from perception to perspective has given me new lenses. Simply put, it’s the only thing that can stop time.

- Angry